Are You Falling to S. Korea’s Societal Pressures?
I’ve usually been quite content with everything in my life. I felt like I’ve always learned to do better and change my style accordingly so as to avoid stress and downfall. Not making enough money? Simple. Try and find a new skill or build up old ones. Then demand a raise. Grades not high enough? No problem. Put in work and cut out some of those procrastination inducing activites. Boyfriend not cutting it anymore? …wait…what boyfriend?
You guessed it! The pressure I’m currently facing in S. Korea is the relationship pressure. Many reports have gone out about how foreigners are corrupting Koreans and warning them to steer clear of us when it comes to dating…well mostly the foreign men, but I’m about to fill you in on a few instances that I’ve experienced constantly since being here.
Experience #1 shocked me instantly: I was walking into my new elementary school and a staff turns and says”…umm are you looking for your child?”
Did I mention I’m a black girl? I’ve seen some slightly tan kids, but no blasians running around in that school.
Experience #2 made me feel a bit self conscious: An ahjumma comes up and says “Oh woooow are you a woman? *gropes me then says* “Oh you are a womaaan~~ you’re so pretty and black!” *while petting me*
I apparently need to go out and buy earrings since she couldn’t tell.
Experience #3 appalled me: The same woman says “Do you have a man? *making a sign for male in Korean* “No!? You need one to have babies!”
(Let it be known that she proceeded to ask the pharmacist for medicine to help me…conceive. I’m guessing that, but she specifically asked for something “good for women”. It’s possible that I watch too many dramas.)
0.0 I’m way too young for babies madam!! T.T Give me time I beg you!
Experience #4 just made life awkward: My lovely co-teacher found out that I still have no boyfriend (7 months in counting). “Why not? I asked all the students for their brothers too! No good men in Suncheon? How old are you? Yea~~ you need to start looking~~!”
Dang it! If they sold men at E-mart I promise I’d buy one!! Did you have to ask all of the students?
Experience #5 saddened me to no remedy: A haraboji (grandpa) comes to sit at my lonely table in the middle of a half packed food court with his two grandchildren. “You live in Korea now? That’s great! Did you marry a Korean!?”
T.T I wanted to say “If you’re willing to let me marry {insert male celebrity} then by all means I will!!”
This alone proves that many people have no problem with a foreign girl deciding to settle down with a Korean man. I also have no qualms with it, but love is not that easy to find right?
Access my blog below to see more random events in my Korean life.
Any societal pressures making you want to change your ways?
Written by: Jamasian
A girl that wants to travel and experience new cultures and find a satisfying life. Visit my website for on on life in Korea jamasianinkorea.blogspot.com
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Great article!! This is so funny but so true! I’ve been here nearly 9 months and have been asked if I have a boyfriend or am interested in any specific korean guy. I am working on learning my korean so I started attending Korean young adults at the church. My Korean is pretty good I think so it has been suggested to me a few times by one of my co-workers, actually she told me that I need to get married with a korean man! I think her intentions were good, not really about pressure I think as I said I want to go to public school after I’m finished my second year…it will be “easier” if I marry a Korean! ha Loved the comment about E-mart btw…
19/07/2012
Yeah even as a guy you are asked if you have a girlfriend and God forbid you say no. You are then bombarded with a thousand questions. I know relationships are important in Korea but why must everyone be in a romantic relationship? Some people just choose to be single!
Tate recently posted..The story of the Name-Maker
20/07/2012
It’s far more socially acceptable for a foreign woman to date a Korean man than vice versa. Your experiences sound about par for the course. I’ve been harassed about getting married since I landed here.
23/07/2012
Why is it “far more socially acceptable for a foreign woman to date a Korean man” than the other way around? Are Koreans racist or something when it comes to interracial marriages? But then again my wife(black) and I experience the same thing!
24/07/2012